Miaka in Yuugiland
by dumplingpriestess
Summary: This is my adaptation of Alice in Wonderland, using FY characters. ~*FINISHED*~ PLEASE R/R! Pardon the length--I wrote it when I was 15.
1. In Which Miaka Envisions Tamahome and He...

Hello! I wrote this story awhile ago, but never got around to posting it until now. This was actually quite long before, but I've edited since then. (whew!) I took Alice in Wonderland, by Lewis Carroll, and Fushigi Yuugi, twisted the two together, and put fingers to the keyboard. I'll admit, the first chapter is sort of boring, but it sets the scene, I suppose. So, go! Read! And remember to please review when you're done!

***All Alice in Wonderland and Fushigi Yuugi characters and plotlines belong to their respective creators and I own nothing, except a computer, some twisted ideas, and on occasion, some original characters.***

1) In Which Miaka Envisions Tamahome and He Appears 

It was a beautiful spring day in the land of Konan; one where the weather was just the right temperature and everything sparkled like Hotohori-sama after he powdered his face. Miaka, holding a cupcake in each hand, came skipping down a path towards her favorite tree. It was at this tree where Miaka would plunk herself down and sit thinking about Tamahome and complaining about being bitten by ants. 

Upon arriving at this tree, Miaka did just that. She plunked herself down, finished her cupcakes, complained about the increasing ant population, and thought about Tamahome. As visions of Tamahome danced in her head, all prior thoughts, especially the important ones, were forgotten. 

"What a nice day," she said. 

"But what would make the day even better is if Tamahome stopped chasing after money and patted me on the head more often," she added, holding her hands close to her chest like she usually did when Tamahome was around. Her eyes took on a glazed-over appearance. This coma-like trance, however did not last long. It was interrupted by a harried voice. 

"I'm late! I'm soo late!" 

Miaka shook her head, clearing the rapidly constructed cobwebs that had formed in her noggin in the last five minutes. Steam poured from her ears; her face twisted into a look of anger and turned a lovely shade of red. 

"Who dares interrupt my daily daydreaming of Tamahome?" she growled, fists clenched. 

A man with dark blue hair ran past her. 

"I'm late! I'm late! Where's the money that I made by raising the admission prices to the Konan palace?" he yelled, searching his pockets for the bag of money that was now MIA. 

The gears and levers in Miaka's brain turned as she attempted to identify the voice and match it to the person who just ran by. After several seconds, a loud sound was emitted from Miaka. 

"TAAMMAAHHOOMMEE!" she squealed, drawing out the pronunciation so that the normally eight-letter name now consisted of fifteen letters. 

"Tamahome! Where are you going?" she cried as she took off running after him. 

"Wait Tamahome! I wanna come!" she wailed as her eyes began vibrating. Unfortunately, as Tamahome did have a thirty yard head start and she was a lot slower than him, Miaka soon lost sight of her beloved Tamahome. Only his voice, carried by the wind, let Miaka know that she was not alone in this wood.

"Oh dear! Where is that money? I'm sooo late! I'm gonna get whipped if I don't get this money to..." Tamahome's voice trailed off, leaving Miaka all by herself in the dark forest, with no indication of where he went. 

Will Miaka find Tamahome? And why is Tamahome going to be whipped?! Find out in the next installation. (And hopefully, I'll have it out in a reasonable amount of time.) Please review, thanks!


	2. In Which Miaka Follows Tamahome into a T...

No long author's notes today. Here's the next part to Miaka in Yuugiland. Enjoy!

***All Alice in Wonderland and Fushigi Yuugi characters and plotlines belong to their respective creators and I own nothing, except a computer, some twisted ideas, and on occasion, some original characters.***

2) In Which Miaka Follows Tamahome into a **Tree and Finds Herself in a** **Situation **

Miaka had come to a dead end. Although most people would have given up and gone back home, not Miaka. She knew what she wanted in life (good food, someone to cuddle with, and a trademark name for her hairstyle) and was determined to get it. 

"This is where Tamahome was last," she said. "I think. Where did Tamahome go? Was he kidnapped? Did Nakago take him away again?" Miaka asked herself. Somehow, her eyes had missed the eye catching hole in the tree and the footprints leading there.

Finally, she saw the tree and the hollowed-out-cave-like space.

"Wow! What a big cave-like space. Maybe-- nah. Is it possible that-- nah. I know! He--nah." While Miaka's brain debated the issue on whether it was possible that Tamahome walked in through the opening of the tree, Miaka's legs, which were not attached to her brain and thus had a mind of their own, began walking toward the tree. 

"Oh well," she said as she was propelled forward, "I guess I'll just have to find out. Maybe he is in there. Then if I get in some sort of trouble, Tamahome will save me and pat me on the head." She did the hand-clutching-at-the-chest-thing again and her eyes proceeded to vibrate to the point where it probably becomes dangerous to a person's health. This pose was held for a few seconds. She then made a fist with her right hand and held it in the air. 

"Go!" she cried, and ran through the opening. 

She proceeded into the interior of the tree. As she walked in further, it became progressively darker and harder to squeeze through. 

"Oh dear! I hope I don't get stuck in here. And I hate the dark. I wish Tamahome was here so he could comfort me in my time of need. Maybe he is here and he's just--AAAAAHHHHHHH!" 

Miaka's last sentence broke off as the floor gave way. It then resumed when she began screaming and plummeting downwards. After screaming her lungs out and flailing like a fish for several minutes, she realized that she was falling, but very slowly. 

"I wonder where I'm going? To another world, perhaps? Will I get to be Miko there?"

Miaka pondered this and other important matters ( was there good food in this world?) for a few more minutes until she started seeing light at the end of the vertical tunnel. Drifting to the ground, she landed, not on something soft or on something hard, but on someone's head. Rolling to the ground, she picked herself up, brushed the dirt off her clothes, and looked around. She stood in a small, square room, empty save for the man she landed on and the desk he was at. The man sat, writing a letter, and paid no attention to her. 

She peered at the man, hoping to get his attention. He was in his late teens, had his brown hair done up in a bucket hat, and was wearing the ugliest clothes she had ever seen. He wore a large red maternity dress, complete with frills and ruffles. Shoes with upturned toes that looked like duck beaks finished the outfit. 

"Miaka," the man said, looking up. He smiled, and seemed to shine, or sparkle perhaps. 

"H-H-Hotohori!" Miaka exclaimed, clearly surprised. "What are you doing here?" 

"I am composing a letter." he answered. "So good of you to drop in on me."

"Sorry ," she apologized, "I didn't mean to."

Hotohori smiled again, and he became so sparkly that she had to shield her eyes.

"Don't worry about it. Why I --Miaka! What's wrong?" Seeing Miaka squint her eyes, a concerned look crossed his face and he stopped sparkling. 

"N-Nothing," she lied as a teardrop formed over her head. 

"Good." Hotohori turned the corners of his mouth up into a smile, but Miaka caught this. She waved her hands and shook her head hoping to keep him from smiling so he wouldn't blind her. 

"Please, you don't have to smile, Hotohori." 

Hotohori nodded at what she said, and went back to writing. Afraid she had hurt his feelings, Miaka opened her mouth to speak, but was silenced when Hotohori looked at her. 

"The key is on the table, Miaka. It opens the door ." He pointed to a table in the far corner that hadn't been there before. Puzzled, she walked over to it. On it lay a gold plated key, with most of the gold flaked off. She picked it up and placed it in her pocket. 

"Wha--" she began, but stopped when she found that she was the only person in the room. 

"Where did Hotohori go? Did Nakago take him too? And where's that door Hotohori mentioned? I don't see a door." 

Miaka scrutinized the room closely, looking for any sort of hidden door that Hotohori might have used as an egress. While doing so, she found something of more importance than Hotohori or an exit: food. 

On the table where she had found the key, a bottle now appeared. It had no label, just a sign that read "Drink Me". 

Being quite thirsty, she swallowed the contents of the bottle in one gulp, disregarding the little voice in her head that screamed, "It's probably poisoned!" 

A great jabbing feeling in her stomach was felt, and she doubled over in pain. When it stopped, she found that the table had grown much larger than her. 

"Now how did that table get so big? Or did I get so small?" 

Her stomach now growled and snapped at her, informing her that it needed food. "Too many questions. I'm soo hungry. I haven't eaten in an hour." she said, griping her middle. 

A chime was heard, and a box of Dingie Rings (tm) appeared beside her with a sign that read "Eat Me ". 

"Ooooh!" she cried. "Dingie Rings (tm)!" Ripping open the package, she stuffed three in her mouth at once. She proceeded to eat in this uncivilized manner until the whole box was gone. Her stomach went into spasms again, and when they stopped, she was _ten _times her original size. 


	3. In Which Miaka Gets Out of Her First Sit...

***All Alice in Wonderland and Fushigi Yuugi characters and plotlines belong to their respective creators and I own nothing, except a computer, some twisted ideas, and on occasion, some original characters.***

3) In Which Miaka Gets Out of Her First Situation and Into Another 

Miaka found herself smashed in the small room. Forced into fetal position, her arms and legs sought any open space. Miaka found herself quite uncomfortable. Her eyes began to fill with tears, and soon the salty water came spilling out like a broken fire hydrant. 

"What am I to dooooo?" she wailed, emphasizing the extra O's in do. "Hmmm...they were good Dingie Rings (tm), though." She paused, thinking. Then, "I don't wanna stay in here! TAAMMAAHHOOMMEE!" 

Miaka's anguish reverberated off the walls of the room. Her overly large tears came pelting to the ground. And as she is quite a crybaby, a small pool of water began to fill the room. 

"And I didn't even find the door that Hotohori was talking about! " she cried. More giant teardrops rained down. The pool became a small lake and it lapped at her shoes. 

"TAMAHOME!" she wailed, finally pronouncing his name with no extra letters. More tears fell. The small lake turned into a small ocean and now reached her chin. Suddenly she felt the pressure of the walls on her back diminish and she was able to lift her head out of her lap. She was shrinking back to her normal size because of the water. 

Now she really was in an ocean, for although her size had changed, the amount of water in the room did not. As she flailed around (she never did understand why she never passed First Aid' s swimming test. So what if she never got past the "minnows/beginner's pond"), Miaka attempted to remember that vital advice she had received those three days did attend the swimming class. 

"What was it that we first learned? Hmmmm don 't waste all your energy by panicking and flailing around...no that's not it Maybe don't breathe underwater...no that's not it either...I know! Wait at least ten minutes after eating before entering water! Oh no! I ate those Dingie Rings(tm) five minutes ago!" 

Severe cramps suddenly took hold of her stomach. She gasped in pain, and in panic, began taking gulps of water instead of air. Her legs and arms began to hurt and she felt lightheaded from lack of oxygen. Unable to last any longer, she said good-bye to her beloved Tamahome and was about to sacrifice herself to the water gods when she rammed up against something hard. 

Finding that this object she had floated into had many hand holds, she latched on to them like a leach on a person's skin. Squeezing her eyes closed, Miaka gritted her teeth, held on for dear life, and prayed that the water would somehow go away. 

Much to Miaka's surprise, the water began to recede. The waterline declined, until finally, it disappeared. Miaka opened her eyes and much to her surprise, she found herself not in the small room, but on top of a house located in thecountryside.


	4. 

Hiya! Here's the next part to my story. It seems that I'm quite nasty to Miaka in this chapter, so be forewarned. Slowly but surely, we're approaching the more interesting parts to this story. So sit back and have fun reading.

***All Alice in Wonderland and Fushigi Yuugi characters and plotlines belong to their respective creators and I own nothing, except a computer, some twisted ideas, and on occasion, some original characters.***

****

4) **"TAAMMAAHHOOMMEE!!"**

Miaka climbed down off the roof of the house, and was finally able to see the house that had saved her life. It was a one-story, small cottage, and had a centered door with windows placed on each side. From the door of the cottage a small path led through the front grass to a white fence and gate. Curious as to who lived here, Miaka knocked on the door. 

No one answered. Miaka then tried the doorbell. A familiar tune rang throughout the cottage. 

"I can't quite place it," she said as it played, "but it sounds like the music that always plays when Tamahome gets that funny symbol on his forehead and fights bad guys. Hmm..." As she pondered this further, Miaka opened the door and walked over the threshold. 

"Heelllooo," she called out. "Anybody in heerree?" she said.

She peered inside. Seeing no forms of life, she walked in and began exploring the cottage. 

A kitchen, a sitting room, and a bedroom made up the cottage. The rooms were all empty of any furniture. Only a chair and a small table with a pouch lying on it, placed in the sitting room, showed that someone lived in there. 

"Curiouser and curiouser," Miaka thought to herself. 

Walking closer to the table, Miaka found that she had overlooked a bottle of liquid. ( or had it mysteriously appeared when she wasn't looking?) The label on it read, "Drink Me." 

Whether or not it was the result of eating and drinking the enchanted food and drink, Miaka's brain's gray matter was now considerably smaller than it was originally. This and the fact that it was filled with one long term goal: find Tamahome, and one short term goal: find drink to stave off thirst, led to Miaka's inability to process complex information. Thus, when she saw the bottle, she only processed the simple data (Drink Me) and the complex info (the drink might possibly be enchanted; remember the last time you drank something with a "Drink Me" label on it) was left to diffuse through her brain and skull back into the open air. 

Miaka picked up the bottle and uncorked it. Raising it to her lips, she prayed that the owner of the house wouldn't come home while she was drinking it and demand her to pay for it, seeing as she had spent the last of her money on sweets. As she licked the last drop of the tasty liquid from her lips, she felt a tingly sensation in her fingers, toes, and nose. The tingly sensation spread to her arms, legs, and the rest of her face. The tingling grew stronger, and she watched in horror as her arms and legs began to increase in length right before her very eyes. Her torso also increased in size, and she felt the walls of the cottage trying to resist her ever expanding self. Soon she became so big that her arms and legs were pushed into the other two rooms. Then an arm was forced out the window and a leg out the door. Her left odango pushed out the sitting room skylight. 

"Oh dear. Now how am I supposed to get out of here?" Miaka thought. "Perhaps I can just break the walls down and free myself." Then she remembered a certain wandering monk's advice. _You need to learn to take responsibility for your actions. If you don't, innocent people will suffer on your account. _

"I can't break the walls!" she wailed. "What if some poor family with ten children lived here? Then they'd have no place to go and might freeze to death at night!" Miaka' s sympathy for all things animal, vegetable, mineral, living, dead, good, evil, possessed, etc. overrode her want to get out of the house, and she decided to wait until she got smaller so she wouldn't have to break the walls down. 

Seconds passed. Then minutes. Miaka' s neck began to ache from the weird position she was in. When she felt she could last no longer smashed up inside the cottage, she heard a familiar voice outside. 

"I'm late and I can't find my money pouch! He's gonna kill me if I don't get the money to him in time! He's gonna whip me, beat me, and make me clean out his refrigerator if I don't..." 

The voice trailed off, and Miaka heard footsteps approach her leg. "What in the world is this?" she heard the voice say. 

"TAAMMAAHHOOMMEE!" Miaka yelled with glee. 

"What?! It talks too? And it knows my name? What is this thing in my house?! 

Miaka moved her leg with impatience. "It's me, Tamahome!" she yelled. 

"AGGHHH! It moves too!" Tamahome screamed. 

Miaka heard Tamahome's footsteps as he ran off. "Where's he going?" she thought to herself. 

Just when it was beginning to get quiet, she heard someone running and screaming like a banshee. 

"TAKE THAT YOU EVIL BEING!" 

"What is...OUCH! That hurts!" Miaka cried as Tamahome attempted a flying kick at her leg. 

"Stop it, Tamahome! Stop it!" Miaka yelled. Tarnahome began karate chopping her. 

"I SAID STOP IT!" she screamed. Using the hand that had been forced out of the window, she made it into a fist and pounded it on the ground. Suddenly, it became very quiet. For a while after, Miaka heard nothing. Then, she heard him running around the house, picking up things from off the ground. 

"Now what is he doing?" she muttered. 

"Evil being!" he called out after some time. "I want my house back! I want my money pouch! I want to be on time so I don't have to clean out his refrigerator!" With that last remark, Miaka felt something pelt her arm and leg. 

"Owwwww...that hurts! Tamahome!"

Tamahome, as a last resort to evict the monster from his house, began throwing stones at the arm and leg hanging out of the house. Miaka picked one up with the idea that she would throw them back at him, but found that the stones were now squishy. Twisting her neck so she could look at what she was holding, she found that the stones were not stones, but glazed donuts. 

"Hmmm...perhaps if I eat these, I'll shrink down to a more manageable size?" Miaka thought. The author of this story raised her hands to applaud Miaka for finally using her brain when Miaka added, "Besides, I am hungry ." A huge teardrop 

appeared on the author's forehead and she was unable to see the computer clearly for several minutes. 

The author's vision cleared, and Miaka proceeded to stuff her face with the glazed donuts. After her tenth donut, she felt a tingly sensation on the left side of her scalp, but none on her right. "Mental note, " she said aloud, "change shampoos." 

The tingly feeling then spread throughout her body and she began to shrink. 

Unfortunately, Miaka ate too many donuts, and she shrank down to the size of an insect. Fortunately, by the time she finished her size change, she was right by the door, and was able to get out of the cottage with some ease. As she began her journey across Tamahome's front lawn, Miaka hoped she wouldn't run into anymore strange people or events. 

The author laughed.

Remember, I enjoy reviews, both positive and otherwise. However, constructive criticism is preferred to just flaming. Thanks!


	5. In Which Miaka Meets the Creator and Get...

***All Alice in Wonderland and Fushigi Yuugi characters and plotlines belong to their respective creators and I own nothing, except a computer, some twisted ideas, and on occasion, some original characters.***

****

5) In Which Miaka Meets the Creator and Gets an Earful 

Miaka wandered through Tamahome's lawn for several hours. She passed several insects the same size as her and six large gold coins that Tamahome had dropped in haste. Finally, she was so tired that she sat down, resting her back on the base of a mushroom. 

"What shall I do?" Miaka thought. "I don't like being small. Tamahome." A pouty look appeared on her face, and she wondered when Tamahome was going to come save her and pat her on the head. 

"Well, he can't do that now," she said, "for he will surely squash me if he tries." She sat, thinking. "Maybe," she thought, I can climb on this mushroom and see where I am. Then I'll know where I'm going." 

Miaka stood up and looked at the mushroom. It was as tall as her and almost just as wide. Standing on her tiptoes, she peered over the edge of it. Immediately her eyes met those of an old woman. 

"YAAAHH!" she screeched, and backed up. "It's ugly, what is it?" she whispered to herself as she cowered behind a blade of grass. 

"I heard that." the old woman said. "Who are you?" 

Miaka snuck a peek at the old woman. She did not sit on the mushroom, but floated on top of it. 

"Who are you ?" Miaka asked warily, crawling out from her hiding spot. 

"I am Taiitsukun. WHO ARE YOU?" Taiitsukun peered at Miaka. 

"I-I-I-I'm Miaka Yuuki, priestess of Suzaku. I --" 

"I know who you are, my impertinent one. I am the creator of this universe. I know all. Of course I know who you are. I created..." 

A teardrop formed on Miaka' s forehead as Taiitsukun rambled on. After several minutes, Miaka felt that she had to interrupt. 

"Uhh...Taiitsukun?" Miaka interrupted as nicely as possible. 

The old woman looked up and focused her eyes on Miaka. "Yes? What is it?" 

"Well...I was wondering if you could tell me where I am." 

"Don't you know?" Taiitsukun asked. 

"No, not exactly. I mean, I know where I am but yet I don't and I..." Miaka trailed off as she became more confused of where she was. 

"You should know. You did find yourself here, so you must have had some idea as to where you were going." The old woman closed her eyes as if she was falling asleep. 

"Oh please don't fall asleep!" Miaka cried. "I don't know where I am and I'm not the right size, and--" 

The old woman opened her eyes. "Not the right size?" she asked. 

"Well you see, I was hungry and I drank this liquid and then I--" 

"You were hungry so you drank something?" Taiitsukun interrupted. 

"No, I mean I was thirsty so I drank the liquid and then I ate some Dingie Rings (tm) and then I--" 

"Next time get your facts straight then, Miss Priestess. If you say you ate then say it, if you say you drank then say that. But don't get the two mixed up!" 

Taiitsukun's interrogation affected Miaka so much that she began to cry . 

"I'm sorry Taiitsukun. I didn't mean to..." she blubbered. 

"Don't apologize!" 

"I'm sorr--I mean, okay." Miaka sniffed and wiped the tears from her eyes. Taiitsukun sighed. She was getting tired of this. She had seen many girls approach her and ask for help. This girl was a classic example: wandering around, getting lost, saying they were the wrong size. 

"So you want to be a different size, do you?" 

Miaka blinked. "Well...yes. You see," she said, trying to explain, "three inches is such a horrible height to be and--" 

"What's wrong with that height?" Taiitsukun asked. She was exactly three inches tall. 

"I mean, I'm just not used to it, " Miaka said, almost crying again. 

Taiitsukun closed her eyes again and floated above the mushroom. For several seconds she stayed like that, until Miaka interrupted. 

"Please help me! Don't fall asleep, please! I need to find Taammaahhoommee!" she whined. 

Taiitsukun's eyelids snapped open. "Patience is a virtue," she said, with a slightly irritated intonation. 

"What's a virtue?" Miaka asked. "Is it a food?" 

"This is the priestess of Suzaku? What a dumb girl," Taiitsukun muttered. She closed her eyes again. 

Miaka, not wanting to say anything, stamped her feet, hummed, snapped her fingers, anything to get that old woman's attention. 

"Okay, okay! STOP IT!" Taiitsukun roared after several minutes of Miaka's antics. "One side will make you grow taller; the other side will make you grow shorter." 

"One side of _what? _The other side of _what?" _

"The mushroom! The sides of the mushroom!" Taiitsukun floated off the mushroom and into the grass. 

"Wait! Taiitsukun!" Miaka called. "Am I supposed to eat this? Eeww! I don't like mushrooms!" 

Taiitsukun paused in mid-air, then answered, "Fine! Anything to shut you up! Nyan-nyan!" 

A pink bubble appeared from nowhere and floated over to the mushroom. It popped, and from it came a small girl with sea green hair. She landed on top of the mushroom and smiled. "Yes, Taiitsukun?" she asked with her Adorably Cute Voice(tm). 

"Frost this mushroom so Miaka can eat it," the old woman said, then disappeared in the blades of grass. 

"Yes ma'am! "the girl yelled. "Frosting, frosting, frost, frost!" she cried as she sprinkled something on the mushroom. Then she giggled and disappeared. The pink bubble reappeared and floated away in the same direction that Taiitsukun had gone. 

Miaka walked over to the mushroom. A thick layer of frosting now covered the top, enabling Miaka to eat the mushroom without actually tasting it. 

"Thank you!" she yelled to no one in particular. 

With her left hand, she grabbed a chunk of the mushroom. Then, with her right hand, she did the same thing, on the opposite side. She held the two pieces side by side and inspected them. 

"Well, they look the same. I guess I'll just have to try them and see what happens." She took a bite of the piece in her right hand. Immediately she began to shrink. "Nope. Not that one." Quickly, she took a bite of the piece in her left hand. It reversed the effect of the first piece, and she began to grow. Miaka nibbled from that "increase-size-piece" until she was her original height or what she thought was her original height. Then, she placed the pieces in her pockets. One in her right pocket, and one in her left. 

"Never know when I might get hungry," she thought. 

When she had brushed the crumbs from her hands, she surveyed her surroundings. Nowhere could she find the small cottage or the white fence. All around her was a vast open field of grass. In the distance she could see a big mansion. 

"I wonder who lives there?" she questioned. She raised her right arm in the air, made her fist into a ball, and brought it close to her chest. "Better find out!" she yelled, and ran towards the mansion. 

More parts coming soon! Stay tuned. Reviews welcomed and appreciated. 


	6. In Which Miaka Overhears a Conversation

More of my twisted ideas. In this chapter, I've included some of my friends, who will have larger parts later on, too.

***I claim ownership only to my ideas and original characters. Everything else belongs to their respective creators***

6) In Which Miaka Overhears a Conversation 

After several hours of strenuous hiking across the field, Miaka finally reached the mansion. 

"Boy," she said, wiping the sweat from her brow, "this mansion was a lot farther away than I thought." She looked up at the large house. It loomed above her: the door itself more than three times her height. "And it's a lot bigger, too." 

Miaka pulled the frosted mushroom chunk from her left pocket. She broke off a pieced and ate it. Immediately she doubled in size. 

"That's better," she said. "I can't have everyone stepping on me." Raising her hand, she was about to knock on the door to announce her arrival when she heard whistling. Looking behind her, she saw someone coming up a path towards the mansion. 

"If I hide behind this bush here, then I'll get an idea of what kind of people live in this house." With that idea in her head, Miaka jumped behind the bush and waited to see what would happen. 

A girl walked up to the mansion, carrying a large envelope in her hands. She had light brown hair pulled back into a ponytail, and wore jeans and a T-shirt. She did not knock, as expected, but called out loudly. 

"KNOCK, KNOCK! WHO'S TH--" 

"It' s not Koji, is it?" a voice from inside the mansion yelled. 

The girl grinned. "No! It's Publisher's Clearing House!" 

"What?!" 

The door opened and another girl, this one with dark brown hair pulled back into a bun, appeared. 

"Hey, Katey!" she said. 

"Nice outfit," the girl named Katey said, grinning. 

The doorgirl stepped into Miaka's view, and Miaka saw that she was wearing a tailored suit, such as one a bell boy (or girl) might wear. 

"Har, har," the girl said dryly, "it comes with the job." 

Katey handed the doorgirl the envelope. "Here's an invitation." 

"From Him?" 

"Yup. To play whips." 

The dark haired girl took the invitation. "So you're working for Him now?" 

"Pays good. Gets me away from my sister. And I don't have to wear ridiculous clothes like you. " 

"Hmmm..."

"Anything new?"

"Yes, but the Duchess is having a fit. Chiriko won't act his part." 

"That's not good. I'll come back later, then." Katey paused, then, "Why Duchess? I mean, he is a man, right?" 

"As far as I know. I guess he just likes being called Duchess." 

"Oh. Well." Katey turned and started down the path, whistling. 

"Oh, Katey!" The whistling stopped. Katey turned and looked at the doorgirl. 

"Are you going to the Mad Hatters' party tomorrow?" 

"It's at seven, right?" 

"Yeah, and bring your camera just in case something happens that would make good blackmail pictures.And make sure to wear your fireproof clothing. They don't call Tasuki the Drunken Pyro for nothing!" 

Katey laughed. "See ya' then!" 

"Bye!" The doorgirl waved, then went inside, carrying the envelope. A few minutes later she came back out, this time holding a pad of paper and a pencil. 

Miaka got out of her hiding place and walked up to the door. 

"I wouldn't go in there if I were you." 

"What?!" Miaka looked at the doorgirl. 

"I said, 'I wouldn't go in there if I were you.'"

"Who lives in there?" 

The doorgirl sat down on the steps and wrote something on the pad. "Oh, the Duchess Nuriko, sometimes Chichiri. He usually wanders, though. And Chiriko's visiting for a while." 

"Can I see her?. Miaka politely asked. 

"Him. Can you see him? I don't know. Can you?" 

"I mean, will I bother her if I go inside?" 

"Probably not. _He's _bothered enough as it is and probably won't notice you. But I'd be careful. If he picks something up, most likely he'll throw it." The girl continued to write, pausing every now and then to speak. 

"He?" 

"Yeah. Nuriko is a man. So is Chiriko, and he's twelve, though he looks six." 

"Duchess?" 

"That's what he wanted to be called. I don't ask questions, I just answer the door, among other things." 

Miaka looked at the door. A crash could be heard from inside. She looked at the doorgirl, but the girl ignored her and continued writing. 

"Uh...thanks for the advice...I guess." 

"No problem." 

Miaka was about to open the door, but stopped. Curiosity overcame her and she walked over to where the girl was sitting. 

"I don't mean to pry or be irritating, but, what are you writing?" 

"Just a fanfic." 

Miaka clapped her hands with joy. "Oooh! About what?" 

"A girl who has a really weird dream. She chases this guy around but ends up getting lost. Right now she's getting ready to enter this house and meet two unwilling actors." 

Miaka nodded. "It sounds familiar." 

The girl looked up, slightly surprised and yet pleased. 

"I think I had to read something like it in school." Miaka added. The girl sighed, shook her head, and went back to writing. 


	7. In Which Miaka Meets Two Unwilling Actor...

****

7) In Which Miaka Meets Two Unwilling Actors 

Miaka cautiously walked into the house. It was dark, and it took her a few minutes for her eyes to adjust. When they did, she saw the most beautifully decorated house that she had ever seen. 

It was tastefully done in whites, with light green and purple splashes of color for accent. The furniture and carpeting were all new, and it was impeccably clean. Not a speck of dust could be found anywhere. 

"Hello? Anybody here?" 

Miaka walked from room to room, looking to see if anyone was home. It was unnaturally quiet. 

"That doorgirl was wrong. There's nobody in this ho--" 

Suddenly the sound of something being smashed and someone screaming (the author takes a minute to admire her well constructed sentence with alliteration in it) was heard from the kitchen. 

"You can't make me, Nuriko!" 

"I can't make you, but the author can! Please!" 

"But I don't wanna!" 

"Chiriko!" 

The sound of a glass breaking followed the last voice. Miaka tiptoed to the closed kitchen door. A beam of light from beneath the door escaped into the darkness, as if it wanted to say, "Get me out of there!" 

Miaka slowly opened the door. With one eye she saw a little kid who looked about six holding a scroll and yelling at someone. She opened the door a little further, and saw a hand throw a cup at the kid. The kid ducked, then ran behind a chair. 

"I don't care if you don't want to do it! You have to! That's your only part in the story!"

"Why do I have to be the baby? I don't want to be the baby! Why can't Tasuki be the baby?"

"Because Tasuki doesn't look like he's six."

"But I'm twelve!" 

"Well you look six!" 

"But Tasuki acts like he's six!" 

"The author wants you to be the baby!" 

"I don't wanna turn into a pig!" 

The throwing of things had ceased for the time being, so Miaka opened the door all the way. Standing on the other side of the room was a woman with clenched fists. She had long purple hair pulled into one braid. 

The kitchen (if you could call it that) looked like a battle zone. Where the other rooms had new matching furniture and wallpaper, this room looked twenty years old. The yellowing wallpaper was peeling away from the walls, and the avocado green paint had flecked away in some spots. Cupboards and drawers were open and all their contents were on the floor. Most were broken. A few plates and dishes were whole, but they lay right next to the woman's hand, in case she needed to throw something. 

Miaka opened the door, and the room became silent. The woman and the kid looked at the intruder . 

"Who are you?" the purple haired woman asked. 

"Ummmm... I'm Miaka. I'm not bothering you, am I?" 

(The author takes time to laugh and hope that maybe Nuriko will hit Miaka with a sharp plate.) 

"We were kind of in the middle of something, girlie-girl." 

The kid ran over to Miaka, grabbed her arm and pulled her into the battle field. "No, no! Stay! You're not bothering me!" he said as he hid behind her. 

Miaka swallowed her fear, and asked a question that had been pestering her since she had walked in the house. 

"Why are you guys fighting?" she asked. 

The woman sighed and sat down on a chair. "We're part of a story, and the author wants Chiriko here ("That's me," Chiriko whispered to Miaka.) to play the part of the baby." 

"But what Nuriko didn't tell you was that the baby has to turn into a pig! I don't wanna be a pig!" 

Miaka gasped. "You're Nuriko?" 

Nuriko flashed a smile and brushed a stray hair out of his eyes. "The one and the only." 

"But you're a man, right?" Nuriko nodded. 

"I thought you were a woman!" 

"People are always getting confused. That's because I'm so beautiful." 

"And some of Hotohori's vanity rubbed off onto him, too." Chiriko muttered. 

Nuriko growled and threw a plate. Miaka and Chiriko ducked. Chiriko ran over and whapped Nuriko on the head with his scroll, then ran back to the chair he was first hiding behind. Miaka ran to a corner of the room, hopefully getting away from the flying objects. 

"CHIRIKO!" 

"I refuse to play the part!" 

More things flew across the room. The sounds of things smashing and people yelling continued. Miaka's face went into SD form, and a large teardrop covered her eyes and obscured her vision. 

"It's pretty bad, no da." 

"What?" Miaka wiped the teardrop away and jumped when she saw a little man in SD form sitting beside her. 

"The author's going to be really peeved, no da." 

Miaka stared at the man. He had light blue hair cut into a weird style, and was wearing a mask. He held a conical hat in one hand. 

"Who are you?" Miaka asked. 

"Oh, I'm Chichiri, no da." 

Miaka opened her mouth to say something, but was cut off by the blue haired man. 

"She's coming, no da!" 

"Who's coming?" 

Nuriko and Chiriko froze. Nuriko picked up a pepper shaker and hurriedly sprinkled pepper in the room. Chiriko started sneezing. Nuriko then rushed over to Chiriko and shook the pepper shaker over his head. 

"Who's coming?" Miaka wailed, annoyed because no one paid any attention to her. "And why are you doing--" 

The kitchen door banged open. In walked the doorgirl, holding the envelope. 

"Not yet. I've sprayed tons of pepper on him, but Chiriko just doesn't turn into a pig." Nuriko said, his voice shaking. 

"I see." the girl replied. Chiriko sneezed. 

"Oh well," the girl said, smiling. "Nevermind about the pepper thing anymore." Nuriko and Chiriko visibly relaxed.

"Really? I don't have to turn into a pig anymore?" Chiriko asked.

"Nope."

Nuriko pointed to the envelope. "What's that?" 

" An invitation from Him. To play whips." The girl handed the envelope to Nuriko. 

"Where's Chichiri?" she asked, looking around. 

"He's right here." Miaka said, and pointed back behind her. She turned and jumped. A blue cat with a wide grin now sat beside her. She looked closely and saw that it _was _Chichiri, but in cat form. 

The girl nodded in satisfaction at what she saw, then turned and left. 

"Well, I should be going now, no da." 

Miaka turned back to Chichiri and found that he had turned back into his human form. He raised his hat above him, then lowered it, disappearing into it. 

"Now who's gonna clean up the mess, eh Chiriko?" Nuriko asked as he eyed their surroundings. 

"Not me!" 

"But I didn't make such a mess!" Nuriko said, his voice going a couple octaves too high. 

"Yes, you did!" Chiriko whapped Nuriko on the head again with his scroll. 

"Why you little..."

Miaka quietly slipped out the door and made her way quickly out of the house. Hopefully they wouldn't see her and ask her to help clean up. And maybe she could talk to that doorgirl again. 

Miaka exited the mansion, but the girl was gone. 

"Now where do I go?" Miaka thought. Seeing the path that the girl Katey had used, Miaka took her chances and decided to follow it. 

"Maybe I'll find Tamahome," she said as she skipped down the path.


	8. In Which Miaka Joins Two Mad Hatters For...

****

This chapter is one of my favorites, because it has my two favorite characters in it. Oh, and I make a small appearance, too. Looking back at it, I see that I am quite mean to Miaka. In fact, I'm down right nasty. Oh well, it's just a story. 

***I claim ownership to nothing except myself, some original characters, and some twisted ideas***

8) In Which Miaka Joins Two Mad Hatters For Tea and Manages to Piss Off the Author 

Miaka stumbled along the path, gripping her middle. 

"I'm so hungry," she said, between stomach growls. "I could eat five nine inch cakes." 

Miaka continued forward, hoping something, someone, (anything really) would come along and offer her food. She focused on the path before her, hoping it would take her mind off food. It didn't. After several minutes, Miaka was about to give up. Then she saw that up ahead the path branched off to the left and the right. In the middle of the path, a shiny object lay. Miaka ran over to it. It was a fork. She picked it up and held it in front of her like a divining rod. Light from above reflected off the clean, shiny, metal eating utensil. 

"Please," she said, now so desperate for food that she was talking to a fork, "please show me the way to food." 

The fork quivered, and very slowly it bent towards the right. 

"FOOD!" she yelled and ran in the direction the fork had pointed to. 

Miaka reached the clearing in five minutes flat. What she saw would make anyone cry with joy. A long ten foot table set for ten people lay covered in cakes, tarts, scones, brownies, all the sweets one could imagine. A large teapot placed in the center acted as a centerpiece. Sitting at the table were two guys. 

One had dark blue hair and funky eyebrows. The other had red hair and was holding a large diamond fan. They both sat at the table, laughing. 

Miaka walked up to them. "Hi I'm Miaka and I'm so hungry can I please have some of this delicious looking food" she asked, leaving out all punctuation marks. 

The two guys looked at her. 

"I'm Koji," the funky-eyebrowed one said. 

"And I'm Tasuki," said the red head. 

"And we're the Mad Hatters!" they announced in perfect unison. 

"There's two Mad Hatters?" 

"We couldn't figure out who would be the Mad Hatter and who would be the March Hare, so we decided to both be Mad Hatters," Tasuki said. 

"And so far, it's worked out great!" yelled Koji. 

"Have you been drinking?" Miaka asked suspiciously. 

"Just tea!" said Tasuki a little to loudly. 

At that moment Koji spilled his drink and Tasuki laughed at him. Koji laughed too, and soon the two were cracking jokes. 

Miaka looked at the table filled with wonderful food and then glanced at the two people sitting at it. She hesitated, wondering how safe it was to be with these two characters. 

"Please, Miaka, sit down. They're harmless." 

"Who's that?!" 

A girl with long dark brown hair sat in front of her. She had on a pair of jeans and a light blue shirt. She smiled. 

"Wait! You weren't there before! How'd you get there?" Miaka eyed the girl, then gasped. "You're the doorgirl!" 

"Yes, that's one of my jobs," the girl replied. 

"Who are you? How do you know my name?" 

"I am Megan. The author." She smiled again. Raising her left hand, she snapped her fingers and a chair pulled away from the table. 

"Please sit. We have more than enough room at the table. And I know how hungry you are." 

Miaka, hesitated, but hunger overcame fear. She plopped down on the chair and immediately reached for one of the delicious looking brownies. 

"So tell me," Miaka said between mouthfuls of cake, "if you're the author, how can you be here and write the story at the same time?" 

"I am the author. I can do anything I want. " Megan looked at Miaka's clothes and raised an eyebrow. They turned bright fuchsia with white polka dots. 

"YAAAHH! I get your point!" Miaka yelled. "Change them back! Please!" 

Miaka' s screeching had caught the attention of Tasuki. He grinned and tried to hold back laughter, but couldn't. Miaka stared at him, attempting the evil eye but failing. Tasuki laughed harder. Megan started to giggle. Then she took a deep breath and regained composure. 

"What a cool trick," Tasuki said after several minutes of non-stop laughter. "Do that again." 

Megan patted Tasuki' s hand. "Later." 

Koji, losing interest in other people's conversation, started one of his own. "You would not believe what I saw the other day! What? A flying pig. Is that so? Honest! Had two wings on its back and was flapping them up and down, trying to stay in the air. Did it fly far? No. Fell from lack of..." 

Miaka looked at Koji. He sat on her left. As nonchalantly as possible, she tried scooting over to the right. "He talks to himself?" she muttered. 

" And answers, too." Megan said. 

"TASUKI!" Koji suddenly roared. 

"Huh?" 

"Change spots!" 

"What?" Miaka asked, as she cut herself a slice of pecan pie. 

Koji and Tasuki got out of their chairs. Tasuki stumbled, steadied himself, took Koji' s arm and interlocking it in his, danced in a little circle. 

"They dance, too?" Miaka said as she placed the pie on her plate. 

Megan got out of her chair and pulled Tasuki away from Koji. Taking his arm like he did with Koji, they danced in a circle. Koji continued to dance by himself for several seconds. Then, realizing his partner was with someone else, he pulled Miaka from her chair and started square dancing with her. 

"Help me!" she cried. "I just want to eat!" 

"Change spots, change spots!" Megan yelled. 

Koji, Tasuki, and Megan stopped dancing and stood behind their chairs. The three of them then moved one place setting to the right. Thus Megan was sitting where Tasuki had been, Tasuki was sitting were Koji had been, and Koji now sat where Miaka had been. 

The three took their seats and continued talking. Miaka blinked, trying to regain her senses. Even the author was crazy . 

Remembering her pie, she ran back to the table. Koji, though, had just finished it. He burped. 

"You jerk! you ate my pie!" 

"It was on my plate." 

"No fair! You stole my seat!" 

"Hey, we changed spots!" 

"MEANIE!" 

Megan sniffed the teacup that Tasuki had been drinking out of. "Tasuki," she said in a stern tone of voice, "have you been drinking?" 

"Yes," he said sheepishly. "But not the *hic* good stuff." He grinned. "I'm saving that for tomorrow's party." 

"I think you'd better just drink tea for the rest of today ." Megan said as she poured him a cup. 

"Wait!" he yelled, staggering out of his seat. "It's not hot!" He pulled out his diamond fan and waved it in the air. He pointed it at the teapot and teacup. "REKKA SHINEN!!" he yelled. Flames shot out from his fan. His aim was off, however, and he ended up flaming most of the food. 

"Hee hee," Tasuki said as he fell back into his seat, "its one of those *hic* French dishes where everything's on fire." Then he fell forward into his plate, unconscious. Fortunately, there was nothing on it. 

"They don't call you the Drunken Pyro for nothin'," Megan said as she affectionately patted him on the head. 

"Crazy, everyone's crazy. Even the author's crazy. Crazy and drunk... " 

"What?" Megan asked Miaka.

"I thought you said they were harmless. Did you see how close that drunken moron got to frying me?" Miaka cried. She took an empty plate and began hitting Tasuki with it. Tasuki groaned.

Megan's eyes snapped over to Miaka's direction, successfully achieving the evil eye. 

"Uh oh, " Miaka whispered. 

Megan raised her right hand and time stopped. Koji, who was pouring tea into a cup at that moment, froze. Even the tea stopped flowing. Tasuki lay with his head on his plate, unmoving. Only Miaka and Megan were free of the time freeze.

"As author," Megan said, "I have special privileges, one which includes freezing time." 

Miaka gulped. 

"Another, which is killing off the main character." 

"Would that be me?" Miaka asked. She grinned nervously. Megan stared back. Miaka cowered behind the plate she was holding. 

"Please don't hurt me," she whispered. 

"Don't ever say anything bad about Tasuki and Koji, even if they are..." she searched for the right word, "legally intoxicated. They would never hurt anyone unless that person brought it upon themselves. I made you the main character. Even though you are a ditz, a pig, and stupid I thought that I'd give you a chance; I thought maybe you could prove me wrong. And now you badmouth two of my favorite characters? And then assault one of them, the one who is unconscious and unable to defend himself?" She pointed to Tasuki. 

"I guess I blew it, " Miaka said. 

"That's an understatement!" Megan screamed. 

"I just want to find Tamahome, " Miaka whimpered. 

"Oh, you just want to find Tamahome," Megan mimicked, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Well, I'll write it so you can't have him!" 

Miaka's eyes went wide with fright. 

"You 'll finish the story since you are the main character, but I won't let you have Tamahome," Megan said, her eyes blazing with anger. 

"You can't have him!" 

"I don't want him. I simply want you to suffer. After all, it's only a story, _right?_"

Miaka trembled. "You're as bad a Nakago," she whispered. 

"I HEARD THAT!" 

Miaka cringed. 

"I'll give you five minutes to get out of here and on with the story before I unfreeze time. If you're not out of here by then, I'll flame you, and believe me, I don't need a fan." 

Miaka nodded. Dropping the plate, she snatched a piece of unburned cake off the table and scrambled out of her chair. Then she ran as fast as she could away from the author and characters. 

Time unfroze and as Miaka fled from the scene, she heard conversation 

resume. 

"Tasuki, are you okay?" 

"Where's that Miaka girl?" 

"Oh, she said she was busy and had to be going..." 

Ok, so I get mad at Miaka for a very trivial thing. Yeah, it's lame, but I needed her to do something that would make everyone angry at her -- it's important later on. So flame me, praise me, but remember, I enjoy reviews!


	9. In Which Miaka Takes Advice From a

Make sure you join the Drooling Tasuki Fan Club if you're a fan of Tasuki. It really exists! 

9) In Which Miaka Takes Advice From a "cat" 

Miaka walked along the path, replaying the events at the Mad Hatters' place in her head. "Why did Megan get so upset with what I said about Tasuki? Just because they're your favorite characters doesn't mean you defend them like that unless..." she gasped, "unless she's in the Drooling Tasuki Fan Club!" 

Miaka stumbled on a rock and fell, skinning her knee. Unfortunately, she figured it was just her own carelessness that had caused her to fall, not the author warning her to shut her mouth. 

"I mean, does she like him or something? She's so possessive!" 

__

Keep talking if you want to have third degree burns a voice in her head whispered. 

"EEEPPP! She can read minds, too!" 

Miaka pasted a fake smile on her face and walked forward. "Think happy thoughts," she thought to herself, "think happy thoughts." 

"So you pissed off the author, no da," a voice in front of her said. 

"Who's that?" Miaka spun around in a circle, looking for the speaker, half afraid that it was Megan in disguise. 

"It' s me, Chichiri, no da." 

In the path in front of her stood the blue haired man, grinning. This time, however, he was his normal size and not in SD mode or in cat form. 

"But I didn't mean to make her mad!" Miaka said. "I only said what I said because--" she stopped in mid-sentence, remembering Megan's threat. 

"Because..." Chichiri prompted. 

"Because, uhhh...*hehe,* well, um...it doesn't really matter now, does it?" Miaka laughed nervously, hoping an anvil or some other heavy object wouldn't fall on her head. 

"I guess not, no da, " Chichiri replied, still smiling. "If I were you, though, I'd be careful, no da." 

"How come?" 

"I've talked to the author and she's not happy. If you continue the way you're going... well, lets just say the story ending is not going to be happy, no da." 

" Are you one of Megan's favorite characters?" Miaka asked suspiciously. Chichiri nodded and grinned. 

Miaka looked at him. "He seems nice, " she thought. "I wonder what he means by 'the story ending not being happy.'" 

"I'm saying, if you walk down this path trying to find Tamahome or a way out of here, it will only bring you to Him, no da. And I'm fairly sure you don't want to meet him, no da," Chichiri replied, as if he could read her mind. 

Miaka looked at the path she was on. A chilling breeze passed, and she shivered. The path then became very dark, shadowy, and ominous. A wolf howling in the distance was heard. 

"So what do I do?" Miaka asked. 

"Well, I can transport you out to-- " he paused and closed his eyes. He was silent for several minutes. Finally he nodded and looked at Miaka. 

"What?" 

"Nevermind, " he said, smiling again, "Megan says that it would ruin the story if I transported you out of here, and I have to agree, no da." 

Miaka stood silent, stunned at the sudden turn of events. Chichiri went into SD mode and raised his hat above him. 

"Be careful, no da." he warned. Then he lowered the hat and disappeared into it. 

"Now what do I do?" Miaka asked herself. "I don't want to go down this path anymore, but it's the only path I see." 

She sighed, then walked forward into the dark part of the path, forcing herself not to scream and run away. 

******

From her computer, Megan smiled. "She has a lot of courage to walk down that path after what Chichiri said. Either that, or she's really dumb." Megan chuckled to herself, and rubbed her hands together. The next few chapters were going to be fun to write.

******


	10. In Which Miaka Sees a Man Trying to Heal...

Ok, in this chapter, I had to make some modifications from my original writings. The part that is underlined should really be striked out. Does that make sense? You know, the words have the line going through the middle of them as if someone crossed them out. It makes sense when you read it. My word processor doesn't have this capability, though, so I've underlined it instead. Also, I'm singing to _Meccha Hajikete Guts Tobashite, _a THTC song. The first line I use is the part Tasuki sings, and the second line is the part Chichiri sings. So go now and read, and this author's note will make sense.

***hopefully I shouldn't have to do this anymore....everything except what I own belongs to someone else***

****

10) **In Which Miaka Sees a** **Man Trying to Heal Roses **

As Miaka walked down the path, she found that it wasn't as scary as it looked. In fact, the shadows were disappearing and the pathway was becoming lighter. 

"Maybe Megan and Chichiri were just joking," Miaka said, attempting to reassure herself. She looked around, hoping to find Tamahome. All she saw were white rose bushes. 

Miaka walked along the path, admiring the roses. "But why are all of them white?" she thought. "If this is a rose garden, shouldn't there be more colors?" As she contemplated this, she heard a man's voice. 

"Healing Powers!" 

" A gardener?" Miaka thought. She followed the sound of the voice, hoping to meet the gardener and ask him his reasoning behind all white roses. 

"GREAT HEALING POWERS! " the voice yelled, this time much closer. Miaka peeked around a rose bush and saw a strange sight. 

A large man with short, closely cropped black hair stood with his back to Miaka. He held his arms out in front of him, palms facing the rose bush. 

"GREAT HEALING POWERS!" he yelled. Green balls of light emitted from the man's hands and surrounded the rose bush. The roses swayed, then were still. The man then collapsed. 

"Sir, are you all right?" Miaka cried as she ran towards him. 

The man looked up, surprised that someone was in the garden with him. "Oh, I'm fine," he said as he sat up. "I'm just exhausted." 

"If you don't mind me asking, why are you trying to heal roses?" 

The man sighed, as if he had been asked this same question a thousand times. "The roses are white, correct?" 

Miaka nodded. 

"The people who planted them planted white roses. He, however, wanted blood red roses. The people who planted the white roses by mistake were killed." 

"Oh! How terrible!" 

The man nodded. "I can heal people and animals. So I was called here to try and turn the roses red. I have almost drained all my powers and the bush has not changed colors." 

"Oh I wouldn't say that, Sir." Miaka said, trying to be cheerful. "I think the roses are a shade of pink if you ask me." 

The man's face lighted up. "Think so?" he asked. 

"Absolutely!" Miaka replied. 

At that moment, a girl on a horse entered the scene. The girl called out to the man.

"Mitsukake! Your work here is much appreciated. However, someone has fallen ill and He feels that you should care for them before the roses."

"Hey! I know you!" Miaka yelled. "You're that girl Katey who's friends with Megan!"

*******

Megan sat at the computer typing out her story. Katey sat next to her, helping with the details of the story. 

"Wait a minute!" Katey yelled above the blast of Japanese Fushigi Yuugisongs. 

"Energy ari amatte bokeru tokya boke teru. Haritsumeta ito wa kire yasui kara!" Megan sang, horribly off-key. 

"MEGAN!" Katey pressed pause on the CD player. 

"Hey, why'd you do that?!" Megan yelled. "It was just getting to the best part, too!" Megan said, as a puppy-dog look crossed her face. 

"Why'd you have me coming up on a horse?" 

"Well, you like horses, and. .." she trailed off. 

"Is that all?" 

"No. And I thought it would add some drama to my satire." 

"Since this is a parody, why don't you just have me walk up banging coconuts together." 

"But that's plagiarism, isn't it?" 

"Oh come on, I've seen plenty of fanfics stealing ideas from Monty python movies." 

"Oh." 

Megan pressed play on the CD player. 

"Hazushite miss shi tatte, I.Q. to aikyou. Dare nimo..." 

Katey sighed as a large teardrop appeared over her head. Megan continued to type. 

******* 

At that moment, the sound of a horse's hooves hitting the ground was heard. It approached at a very uneven and unsteady gait. 

*Clip, clop, clip, clip, clippity, clop* "Whoops! Dropped one. Sorry Katey."*Clip, clop, clip, clop, clunk, clip, clop* 

Two people arrived at the rose bush; a girl and a young boy. The girl looked slightly annoyed. The young boy held half a coconut in each hand. 

"Chiriko, are those coconuts to big for your hands?" 

"No, Katey I got 'em. It's just hard to get the rhythm right." Chiriko tried banging them together again and dropped the left half. "Oops!" 

Katey sighed at their failed attempt at humor. Then she looked at the man. "Mitsukake, your work here is greatly appreciated. However, someone has fallen ill and He feels that you should care for them before the roses." 

"Hey! I know you!" Miaka interrupted. "You're that girl Katey who's friends with Megan!" Miaka looked at Chiriko. "And you're the one that was at the mansion with Nuriko!" 

"Hi Miaka! I got another part in the story! And I don't have to be a baby! Chiriko waved at Miaka and dropped the other coconut half. 

Katey looked at Miaka. She made a face at the girl, not caring if Miaka saw. "Miaka, He would like see you now. Please follow me and no getting lost." 

Katey turned around and walked away, with Chiriko clip-clopping after her. 

"W-W-Wait up!" Miaka cried as she ran after them. Mitsukake wrapped his hands with cloth and followed. 

Well, that wasn't too terribly horrible, was it? I'm sure by now you're wondering what sort of twisted mind came up with this, right? I wrote this over the summer, when I was extrememly bored; that should explain everything. So review my work and tell me your thoughts. Thanks!


	11. In Which Miaka is Introduced to HIM

Yay! I'm glad you guys like my story! For those who were interested the web address to the Drooling Tasuki Fan Club (DTFC) is www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Temple/8545/, as of 1.7.01. If, at a later date, it doesn't work, just try putting in Drooling Tasuki Fan Club at any search engine. Oh, and I don't own DTFC, but I worship the one who does! 

Amy - *sweatdrops at the teardrop mistake* Oops. Thanks for telling me.

11) In Which Miaka is Introduced to HIM 

Miaka walked behind Katey and Chiriko. Not knowing where they were going, she hoped that Katey wasn't going to lead her somewhere horrible, like to see an egotistical maniac who like to behead people with spirit bombs. Just as Miaka finished that thought Katey's shoulders began to shake and Miaka heard the sound of stifled laughter. 

"Is something funny?" she asked, wondering what Katey was laughing at. 

"Oh...nothing," Katey replied, still holding laughter back. 

"Tell me!" Miaka whined. 

"Be quiet!" Katey snapped. "You'll find out later. 

"Oh, goody," Miaka clapped her hands together with joy. 

__

She just doesn't realize what she's getting into, does she? Katey thought. 

_Nope. Not at all _Megan replied, communicating telepathically with Katey. 

Katey led Miaka to a fairly large clearing where she stopped. Chiriko's feeble attempt at coconut clapping ceased. Miaka looked around. 

The clearing was set up in courtroom format. To Miaka's left were several seats that were (she assumed) for a jury. To her right was a witness stand. In the middle stood a judge's table. 

"Why a courtroom setting?" she thought to herself.

A group of people entered the clearing. Tasuki, now experiencing a hangover, stumbled to one of the jury seats with the help of Megan and Koji. Nuriko followed behind them. Taiitsukun and the pink bubble floated in. The bubble popped, and Nyan- nyan appeared. They too sat down in the jury seats. Then a jingling was heard, and Chichiri made his appearance, accompanied by his jingly staff (tm). Hotohori was the last to arrive. He gracefully made his way to the last available seat on the jury, smiling the whole way. Several jurors (names remain anonymous) cringed as they were assaulted by sparkliness. 

As the last juror settled into his seat, the sound of beautiful flute music echoed throughout the clearing. A young man with dirty-blond colored hair entered the clearing. When he reached the middle of the clearing-- 

The music suddenly ceased. 

"Wait a minute!" the flute player yelled to Megan. "My hair is not dirty! I washed it this morning when I fell in the river!" 

"It's just a figure of speech, Amiboshi. I can't say your hair is just plain blond, because that's what His is." 

"Yes, but I'm still offended!" 

Megan sighed and crossed out some writing on a pad of paper. 

A young man with sandy-colored hair entered the clearing. 

"Thank you!"

When he reached the middle of the clearing, the flute player stopped, and faced the jurors. 

"May I present to you Him, Lord Nakago." 

All the jurors stood as Nakago entered, including Tasuki, who leaned against Megan for support. 

A large, blond haired man wearing scary looking armor entered the clearing, glaring at the woman who walked beside him, clinging to his arm. The woman had her red hair pulled into a one sided odango (actually it was more donut in shape). He walked up and stood in front of the jurors. 

"I am Nakago." He said. "You may be--" 

"And I'm Soi!" the woman interrupted.

Nakago glared at her once more, then continued. "You may be seated." All the jurors sat down. Miaka and Katey stood in front of the judge's table, waiting. 

Megan stood and presented Nakago with a crowbar. He took it with his free hand and placed it between his arm and Soi's. He then proceeded to pry Soi off. Once free of her grasp he jumped back and let go of the crowbar. Soi 's arms snapped closed, and she held the crowbar in her arms of death. 

"Oh, Nakago," she cooed, mistaking the crowbar for him. 

Giving her a shove back the way they had come, Nakago and the others watched Soi walk away from the clearing holding her "Nakago." 

Nakago turned and sat at the judge's table. "First order of business, " he said. 

Katey approached the table. "It is concerning the matters of Tamahome, Nakago. He seems to have not---" 

Katey was cut off as Tamahome rushed to the scene carrying a pouch. 


	12. In Which Tamahome Is Sentenced To Cleani...

This chapter's kind of short. Expect the unexpected.

****

12) In Which Tamahome Is Sentenced To Cleaning Nakago's Refrigerator 

*Damn, the title already gave it away...*

Tamahome rushed into the clearing, all out of breath. He placed the pouch on the table, then backed up and bowed deeply. 

"Lord Nakago," he said finally, after catching his breath, "here's your money." 

Nakago said nothing, but took the pouch. Taking each coin out one by one, he proceeded to count them. The silence in the clearing was deafening as Nakago calmly counted his money. A pin dropped and several jurors jumped with surprise. 

"You're six coins short," he said as he placed all but one of the coins back in the pouch. Unwrapping the gold foil from the last coin, he placed the chocolate in his mouth. 

"I asked for sixteen chocolate geldt and I only received ten. I cannot play dreidel with only ten." 

Tamahome cringed. 

"I'm sorry! I must have dropped them on my way here! I had sixteen in the pouch when I left home! I swear! Don't make me---!" 

"Tamahome," Nakago said, making his deep menacing voice even more deep and menacing. "I sentence you to--" 

"NO, NO! Please! Not the---!" 

"--clean out my refrigerator." 

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

Tamahome dropped to his knees and slowly shook his head as he held it in his hands. 

Members of the jury gasped with surprise. Several began whispering. 

"Have you seen Nakago's refrigerator?" Nuriko asked with disbelief. 

"I've watched Nakago through my mirror for many years and I know for a fact that that refrigerator hasn't been cleaned in five years, three months and twenty-one days," Taiitsukun said. 

"What a horrible job!" Hotohori exclaimed. "To have to clean something!" 

Suboshi, Amiboshi's twin brother, and Amiboshi took Tamahome by the arms. Dragging him to his feet, they led him away from the clearing towards his sentence. 

"Please! I'll do anything else! Don't make me clean the refrigerator!" Tamahome cried as he faded from view. 

"Tamahome!" Miaka suddenly said. 

"Be quiet!" Katey snapped. "Do you want to be in any more trouble then you already are?" She sighed, then turned and faced Nakago. 

Talking continued. Nakago looked around the table for something. He also looked underneath the tablebut didn't find it. Realizing she had forgotten to add an important prop, Megan snapped her fingers and a gavel appeared on the table by Nakago's hand. 

Nakago nodded at Megan, then rapped the gavel on the table. 

"ORDER!" 

The clearing fell silent. 

"Next line of business?" Nakago asked, clearly enjoying how much power he had. 

Katey stepped forward. "The matter of this girl. Miaka vs. Yuugiland." 

Bet you didn't expect that incident with the dreidel (is that how you spell it? Sorry, if it's wrong), eh? Heh, heh.....


	13. In Which Miaka Is Given an Unfair Trial

Hi guys! Thanks for being so patient with me! I'm sorry I haven't posted sooner, but you know how it is once school starts up again. I'll try to be a little more regular. In fact, maybe I'll finish posting today, seeing as I only have a couple more chapters left and they're already typed up. It depends on my mood. 

The Spatula Chick - Yes, I've read Dealing with Dragons, and that's how I got the idea for these titles. Thanks for your reviews! I checked out the Shirtless Nuriko Fanclub and the Nuriko is Not Cheese website. They're great!

Thanks to everyone else for their reviews, too!

***I do not own preowned characters, and credit goes to Patricia C. Wrede and her books for giving me the idea for the titles ^_^***

13) In Which Miaka Is Given an Unfair Trial

Miaka blinked, not believing her ears. "Wha-- ?" 

The jurors began whispering again. Nakago rapped his gavel. 

"Proceed," he said.

Miaka blinked. Suddenly Katey was dressed in a business suit. Miaka looked at the jury and found they had all pulled out pads of writing paper. 

Turning to the jury, Katey spoke. 

"I would like to call the first witness, Miaka Yuumi." 

"That's Yuuki," Miaka muttered. She walked up to the witness stand and sat down. 

"For the record, please state your name and occupation." 

"Miaka Yuuki, Priestess of Suzaku." Several jurors had looks of disbelief. 

"She's the priestess?" whispered Koji. 

"That is not true," Katey said, 

"You are lying." 

The jury gasped and everyone bent over their pad, scribbling something. 

"But I--" 

"For the record, she is a character in a story; an actress." 

"I'll have you know that--!" 

Nakago banged his gavel. "Order!" 

"Miaka lies. As you can see, she doesn't even tell the truth when asked her occupation." Katey looked at Nakago.

"Nothing more, Nakago." 

Nakago looked at the jury. "Any cross examinations?" The jury shook their heads. 

Amiboshi and Suboshi reappeared. Grabbing Miaka's shoulders, they led her off the witness stand to an empty spot in the clearing where they stood. 

"But I didn't even get to explain my--" 

"Order! " Nakago said, making it obvious to all that he liked to hear his own voice and that he was on an ego trip. 

"Next witness." 

"I call Hotohori." 

Hotohori gracefully made his way from the jury to the witness stand, despite his duck shoes. He smiled. Everyone put on sunglasses to avoid the glare. 

"My name is Hotohori. I was just composing a letter when Miaka fell on my head." 

"Make sure you get that, jury," Katey said, "she interrupted someone and fell on his head!" 

"Hey! Wait a minute! A juror can't be a witness! That's not fair!" 

"Miss Yuuki, " Nakago said, "if you can't control your outbursts, I'll have to think of something horrible to punish you with." 

* * * 

"What kind of threat is that?" Katey asked incredulously. 

Megan pressed pause on the CD player, this time pausing in the middle of a David Bowie song. 

"What am I supposed to write, that he'll give Tamahome more kudoku, new clothes, alter his personality , and make him Nakago's minion?" Megan retorted. 

"That would be better than what you just wrote." 

"But it wouldn't make sense because Tamahome was just seen trying to please Nakago, so it seems like he's already under Nakago's influence, or something." 

"True, true," Katey said, scratching her chin. 

"So I'll just leave it as it was?" Megan asked. Katey nodded reluctantly. 

Megan smiled, unpaused the CD player, and continued typing

* * * 

"Miaka has also taken a key of mine and has not returned it." Hotohori continued. 

Katey turned to look at Miaka. 

"Do you have this key he speaks of, Miaka?" Katey asked. 

Miaka reached into her pockets. Her fingers passed empty gum wrappers, frosted mushroom pieces, and then they touched something metal, Pulling it out, she saw that it was the key that Hotohori had pointed out to her. 

"Please place that key in evidence," Katey replied. 

Amiboshi took the key from Miaka's hands and gave it to Nakago. Nakago tried peeling the gold off. Realizing that it was real and not a chocolate key wrapped in foil, he then placed it on the table beside him. 

"Anything else?" Katey asked Hotohori. "Yes. She ate my Dingie Rings (tm)." 

More gasps emitted from the jury. More frantic scribbling on the pads. Katey smiled. "That's all." 

Hotohori left the witness stand and made his way back to the jury. As he passed each person, they took off their sunglasses. 

"Next witness," Katey called out, "Duchess Nuriko!" 


	14. In Which an Unexpected Character Appears

Well, I guess I'll put up a couple more chapters. Another one of my friends makes an appearance. She doesn't anymore, but at one point in time, Tiffany really did talk about having anime hair and drew pictures. But not anymore. It seems that we've grown up. *sob* Except for me, 'cause I'm posting these stories. Anyway, I digress....

****

14) In Which an Unexpected Character Appears 

"So, Nuriko, what were you doing when you first met Miaka?" Katey asked. "I was discussing with Chiriko our parts in the story." 

"Was the interior of your house at that time, oh. ..say, in a state of disarray?" 

Nuriko pondered this for a moment, then answered, "there were a few things out of place in the kitchen, other than that, nothing much." 

" And how did the house look after Miaka left?" 

"The kitchen was totally demolished. Everything was broken." 

"Did Miaka offer to help clean up?" 

"No. She just sneaked out." 

Katey smiled. "I rest my case." 

The members of the jury scribbled something. 

"Hey now!" Miaka yelled. "You didn't even ask _who _made the mess!" 

"Why don't you keep quiet, Miss Yuuki," Katey snarled, "you don't even have a lawyer. 

A lightbulb appeared over Megan's head. She disappeared for a second, then reappeared with another girl. This girl had short black hair and was dressed in a suit similar to Katey's.

"Tiffany," Megan said, "you can be Miaka's lawyer." 

Tiffany slowly walked towards Miaka, ignoring Miaka and looking at her surroundings. "Am I really in your story?" Megan nodded. 

"This is weird, being inside a _story._" Tiffany stopped in front of Miaka and looked at her. "I have to be honest. I don't care what happens to you, but..." her eyes became starry, "I get to be in a fanfic. And..." she continued, pointing to her hair with exaggerated anime movements, "I have anime hair so I fit right in!" 

Katey walked over to Megan and whispered, "What's wrong with her? She's usually not like this. "****

"Story shock. It happens to everyone who is written into a story first time. It should wear off in..." Megan looked at her watch, "five, four, three, two, one..." 

Tiffany blinked. "Okay ," she said, becoming serious, "lets get back to the trial." A desk and two chairs appeared. Tiffany sat down, borrowed Nyan-nyan's pad and pencil, and started writing something. 

"What are you doing?!" Miaka cried. 

"Don't worry , I have our defense all planned," she said as she started sketching Sailor Moon characters. 


	15. In Which the Trial Continues

****

15) In Which the Trial Continues 

"I call Megan!" 

Megan leaned over and whispered something to Koji and Tasuki. Tasuki, who had been leaning against Megan's shoulder, mumbled something incoherent and attempted to sit up. Megan got up, said something else to Tasuki, and walked over to the witness stand. 

Today she wore jeans and a white T -shirt with the Chinese symbol of mountain on the front. Her long hair was pulled back into a ponytail. This allowed everyone to see the words "Mountain Bandits Kick Ass!" written on the back of her shirt in bold red letters. As she sat down at the witness stand, she gave Miaka a "you better watch out" look. 

"She came to Tasuki and Koji's tea party."

"You were there?" 

"Yes. I was invited." Megan paused for effect. "Miaka, however, was not invited." 

"What happened?" 

"She came and sat down, and once her butt was planted on that seat, she proceeded to consume a good deal of food." 

"Were there any problems?" 

Megan nodded. "She bad mouthed Tasuki, and then assaulted him with a plate!" 

The jury gasped. Tiffany's pencil broke. Even Nakago, who was dozing, awoke with a start. 

"So he was a little drunk," Megan continued, her voice rising in anger, "but you all know how he gets when he's tipsy. And he'd never hurt anyone unless they asked for it." She glared at Miaka. 

"I don't want to hear anymore!" Nuriko yelled. "She's guilty! GUILTY!" 

Soon the whole jury was chanting guilty. Megan walked calmly back to her seat, a slight smirk on her face. 

"Wait!" Miaka cried, standing up. The clearing fell silent. The jurors looked at each other. 

"The guilty one dares to speak?" 

"What am I guilty of?" 

The jurors looked at each other again, question marks appearing over everyone's head. 

"The point is..."Megan said, standing up, "that she vandalized, stole, and verbally and physically attacked someone!" 

Everyone nodded. "GUILTY! GUILTY! GUILTY!" 

Nakago picked up his gavel and banged it on the table. "ORDER!" He looked at everyone with a superiority and flipped one of his blond locks behind him. "The only way to settle this is with a game of whips." 

Silence befell the clearing. All the jurors looked grave. 

"Whips?" Miaka whispered. "It sounds kinky." She looked at Tiffany, who by that time had managed to draw a picture of all the Sailor Soldiers (including Chibi-usa), the Sailor Soldiers as princesses, Tuxedo Kamen, Prince Endymion, Chibi-Chibi, and the Starlights. "I thought you had a plan." 

Tiffany shrugged. "Yeah, well, I lied." 

Miaka fell to her knees. "Why does everyone hate me? Why does everyone love Tasuki so much?" 

From the sky fell a scroll. Miaka picked it up and unrolled it. On it was "One-hundred Reasons Why Miaka is Not Our Favorite Character" and "The DTFC's Reasons Why Tasuki is So Droolable." 

Miaka sighed. 

I'll admit, I feel a little bad for Miaka. I mean, who would want a jury like that? And I wish I really did have a shirt that said "mountain bandits kick ass". Questions? Comments? Complaints? Please use the review box. Thanks.


	16. Whips

****

A horrible game, this game of whips is. 

****

16) Whips 

Rules 

1.Everyone participating must have a whip or something that can act like a whip. 

2. All whips or whip-like objects must weighted. 

3. Snap whips only after the whistle is blown and only at designated objects. 

4. No snapping whips at people and/or non designated objects. 

4.5. Once you have chosen your whip, you cannot exchange it. 

5. Any breaking of these rules results in death. 

6. Whoever hits the most objects within thirty seconds wins. 

7. The winner gets a T -shirt. 

8. Those who lose pay Nakago sixteen chocolate geldt. 

9. Nakago is exempt from role number eight, obviously. 

"WHAT?!" Miaka screamed. "What kind of whacked out game is this? And how does this prove whether I'm guilty or not? This makes no sense." 

Megan walked up to Miaka. "Good luck," she said. "You'll need it. Nuriko and Nakago are really good." She laughed and, catching Chichiri's attention, walked away. 

"Miaka, get over here!" yelled Tiffany, who was now dressed in referee attire. "Get your whip!" 

"Are you the referee?" 

Tiffany grinned. "Yup. Here's your whip. It's weighted with five pounds." 

Miaka looked at the handle. A five was stamped on it. She picked it up and almost dropped it on her feet. 

"This is so heavy! This is only weighted five pounds?" 

Tiffany nodded. "Yes. Oh yeah," she added, "the whips are originally fifty-five pounds." 

Miaka's mouth dropped open. She knew she could not exchange it for a lighter one, though. That would be breaking the rules and, well... 

Tiffany blew a whistle. "Places!" she yelled. 

Miaka, Nakago, and Nuriko lined up. Each one of them held a whip. Wait. Each one _had _a whip. Nakago and Nuriko _held _theirs; Miaka's lay on the ground, too heavy for her. In front of them, about ten yards away were three round targets. They hung, suspended in air, from a three foot rope. This rope was attached to a wooden frame. 

A group of spectators gathered on the sidelines. Megan stood by Koji, aiding him with his job of supporting Tasuki, who's footing was still unstable. Katey and Chichiri also stood by, watching. Chiriko had his eyes covered with his overly large sleeves. Lowering his hands slightly, he peeked out from behind his sleeves, ready to re-cover them if necessary. Hotohori and Nyan-nyan also stood watching. Taiitsukun floated. 

Tiffany looked at the contestants. "Ready?" 

Suboshi ran in, holding something in his hand. "Wait! I want to be in this round!" He stood next to Nuriko. 

Tiffany nodded. "Late entry!" she called. 

Amiboshi ran in carrying another target. He tied it to the wooden frame, then signaled to Tiffany. 

Tiffany nodded, then turned to the contestants. "ON YOUR MARK!" 

Nuriko and Nakago held the whip, ready to snap it. Suboshi raised his arm, ready to use his yo-yo. Miaka looked like she was having problems. 

"GET SET!" 

Suboshi, Nakago, and Nuriko braced themselves. Miaka braced herself and attempted to pull the whip from the ground. It refused to budge. 

"GO!" 

The timer began and Nuriko and Nakago snapped their whips. Suboshi threw his yo-yo at the target. The three's targets were hit, and points began flashing on a nearby scoreboard. Only Miaka's scoreboard remained empty. She was still trying to pick the whip handle up. 

"Come on you stupid whip! Come on!" she yelled as she struggled to lift it off the ground. She raised it an inch, then dropped it again. "This is dumb!" Miaka said finally. "I'm not going to do this." 

Tiffany blew her whistle. "STOP!" 

The points were totaled. Tiffany walked towards the four holding a T-shirt that read "Hooked on phonics worked for me!" 

"Sorry guys," she said, "we ran out of the good T-shirts. This is the only one we have left. I have to reorder." She looked at the shirt. "Though I don't know _who _ordered this," she mumbled to herself. 

"The winner is..." Tiffany announced, "Suboshi and his yo-yo of death!" 

"It's not a yo-yo!" Suboshi protested. 

"Well it looks like one." Tiffany retorted. "Anyway, you won. Everyone else has to pay Nakago. Miaka is guilty." She threw the T -shirt at Suboshi and walked over to where Katey, Megan and everyone else was. 

"Suboshi?" Nakago asked. 

"SUBOSHI!" screamed Nuriko."Suboshi! Give me that yo-yo! Now! Give it to me!" Nuriko ran towards Suboshi and tackled him. "I'll show you and your fancy walk-the-dog moves!" 

"NO! You can't have it!" Suboshi cried. 

"Give it to me!" 

"Face it, I'm just better than you!" 

Nakago raised his hand and pointed it at Suboshi. Blue energy began forming around it. 

"Oh no! Duck for cover! Nakago's got a spirit bomb!" Hotohori exclaimed. 

Everyone dropped to the floor. Miaka, however, walked towards Megan and the others. Ignoring the warning, she walked right into the path of the spirit bomb. 

Nakago grinned a really evil grin. "I still want my chocolate geldt from you, Suboshi," he said, and released the spirit bomb. It came hurtling towards Miaka. 

Miaka, as all characters do when something horrible is going to happen but they can't stop it from happening in time, felt something horrible was about to happen and turned to look in Nakago's direction. She saw the blue energy coming at her. 

Time slowed down so everyone could see just how horrible this situation was. 

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" she cried in slow motion. 

Right when it was about to hit her, someone tackled her and pushed her out of the way. Miaka fell to the ground, hitting her head on something hard. 


	17. In Which Yui Comes and Finds Miaka Under...

I know what you're thinking. "Finally, the last chapter." Ha-ha. But really, I am ecstatic, however, because this was my first fan fiction ever written and it's finally posted where other people can read it! Wahoo! So, here's the last chapter *sob*....

17) In Which Yui Comes and Finds Miaka Under the Tree 

* * * 

Megan, Katey, and Tiffany sat around Megan's computer, eating take-out pizza. "You saved her?" Katey asked incredulously.

Megan nodded. "It wasn't in my story line to have her walk in front of the spirit bomb and get killed. Hell, I didn't even know Nakago was going to get so upset and actually throw the spirit bomb." 

"Yeah, well, if Miaka was stupid enough to walk in front of Nakago's energy balls, then she deserves to be killed." 

"Gee, you guys really don't like her, do you?" Tiffany asked. 

"I don't like her, but I don't think she should get killed. Besides, I have my reasons." Megan replied. 

"What are they?" Tiffany asked, curious. 

"One. This parody is rated PG ." 

Katey laughed and almost choked on pizza. 

"Don't die, Katey," Megan said as Katey sat trying to breathe, "I don't want to have to perform the Heimlich and if you die then the story won't be PG ." 

Katey dislodged the piece of food in her windpipe, then looked at Megan. "PG?" 

"Well, there is some violence, but it's like Power Rangers kicking the bad guy's butt..." Tiffany and Katey looked at her with raised eyebrows. "Only better," she quickly added. 

"I don't think Power Rangers was the right thing to compare this parody to," Tiffany said. 

"So what's your second reason for saving Miaka?" Katey asked. 

"I wanted to put my story on the Internet. I can't do that if I had killed Miaka." 

"Why not?" 

"Then I'd be getting a whole bunch of letter bombs from people who actually like Miaka." 

Tiffany and Katey nodded. "True, true." 

"And," Megan added, "it would ruin my reputation as a parody writer. "'Someone got killed in her story' all the anime characters would say. 'You don't want to be in her story.'" 

Tiffany looked at Megan. "You mean you wouldn't feel guilty? No remorse?" 

"Oh, and that, too." Megan said thoughtfully. She reached for the pizza box. 

"Anyone want the last piece of pizza?" Megan asked. Tiffany and Katey shook their heads. 

"Okay," Megan said, "back to the story." 

Munching on the piece of pizza, Megan once again began typing, with Tiffany and Katey watching her. 

* * * 

Miaka sat up, rubbing the side of her head. "What happened?" she asked herself. "Where's ---" Miaka stopped speaking. She looked around her. She was not at the clearing surrounded by Nakago or Nuriko or Megan or Katey or Tasuki or anyone else. She was sitting under her favorite tree.

"I guess I must have fallen asleep," Miaka said. "And then I woke up when I hit my head on this exposed tree root." She pondered this for a few minutes. "That's really weird. It was so real." She sat at the base of the tree, thinking about this for several minutes. 

That was how Yui, Miaka's best friend, found Miaka. 

"Earth to Miaka!" she called out, waving her hands in front of Miaka's face. Miaka blinked. 

"Oh, hi Yui!" she said. 

"Miaka, have you been sitting out here all this time? Your brother's looking for you. You promised to meet him, remember?" 

"Keiske's looking for me?" 

Yui nodded. "Come on, Miaka." 

Miaka got up and followed Yui. "Hey, Yui!" she yelled, "I had this really weird dream! I dreamt that I was following this guy named Tamahome and..." 

Megan appeared underneath the tree, followed by Tiffany and Katey. 

"Well, I finally finished my parody," Megan said. 

"Hey, Megan," Tiffany said, "can we go and see the Suzaku seishi?" 

Megan nodded. "I don't see why not." 

Megan snapped her fingers and the three girls' clothes changed to ancient Chinese-style attire. 

The three walked down the path towards the Konan Empire. 

But that's another story.

The End!! Finally!! Ok, this is your last chance to write a review for me. Come on, you know you want to, at least to tell me to stop harassing my readers for reviews. Please? Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my story. I have others too, which aren't quite as long, if you're looking for something else to read. And if you like my stories, remember to tell others about them. Thanks to all those who read and enjoyed it! 

Megan


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